Category Archives: Pandas speak out

Un-Indicted And It Feels So GOOD!

The un-indicted co-conspirators are starting to pile up!

We had to take one more day off from Pandarella, to point out that there was beginning to be an unseemly number of un-indicted co-conspirators, in various criminal prosecutions around the country, concerned with the fake electors grab that was orchestrated (ALLEGEDLY) by Mittens and his henchmen.

We will definitely be back next week with the next installment of Pandarella, but maybe for at least short term, we will have to limit it to one episode a week, since there is so much OTHER stuff going on! New pandas arriving this summer in Pandiego! Escaped zebras in the North Cascades! Another ducky demise episode at Woodland Park Zoo in Seattle! (Pookie 1: I thought dey said dey WERE lunch!) And that is not even considering the trials of the most crimingest ex “president” this country has ever experienced!

Meanwhile, the un-indicted co-conspirator in chief would like a word…

Take a deep breath and go outside! Play with a duck! Remember: Friend, not food!

Be the Bear
Bob T not yet indicted Panda

Our Commitment to You, The Viewer

Here at The Institute for Contemporary Panda Satire, we take our commitment to mental health (ours and yours) very seriously, and while we do feel a need to pontificate about our ongoing political nightmare, we are going to do our best to keep Mittens and his fascist minions off of the ZooNooZ stage.

Unlike certain TV networks, we have not offered lucrative contracts for Mittens apologists to spread their nonsense on our ‘toon waves.

We are, we should add, powerless to keep Pinky off ZooNooZ.

For reference, a Scaramucci= 11 days.

Be the Bear
Bob T has not been fired by NBC Panda

It’s Hot! Hot! Hot! Indictment Summer!

We’ve been waiting such a long time already!

Not that we would cheapen this event with tasteless revelry or anything like that. I hope we will be forgiven for looking towards this with some degree of anticipation.

Panda commerce note: I’m getting ready to make my original paintings from the book The Panda Cub Swap, (written by Beth Bacon and illustrated by me) available for sale. If you have a favorite painting from the book, please feel free to contact me via the contact us page/form and let me know.

Also, Amazon is raising printing prices as of June 20th this year, and I will need to raise prices so I get the same pittance I already get. So, if you were thinking about acquiring the Panda Chronicles library (10 Books! ) now would be a really good time! The latest book is the definitive look at the political cluster**k of the last 6 years! The only way to consider those times is with pandas!

Keep Being the Bear!
Bob T I know nothing about any duckies at Woodland Park Zoo Panda

Yes, We Are Sick of the Debt Ceiling

This is the last thing I’m going to say about the childish, vindictive GQP who would rather see the entire world go to cwap than let a Democratic president get any credit for doing something well.

Okay…probably not the last thing in general, but the last thing about the debt ceiling.

I. Can’t. Even.

Be the Bear,
Bob T can we just get on with it Panda

Barker Carlson is O-U-T at Foxy Nooz!!!!

I had another ‘toon planned for today, but this morning one of my very alert Panda-spondants alerted me to the VERY exciting nooz, that Tucker Carlson had been fired! No buh bye broadcast, no nothing, although I’m sure he left with his pockets stuffed with filthy “sorry we had to fire you so you wouldn’t cost us more” lucre, no doubt. I imagine they had to do that on top of just agreeing to pay Dominion Voting Software $787.5 MILLION bucks.

In honor of the exodus of Barker from Foxy Nooz, I thought I would share some of his finest moments, as dramatized by The Panda Chronicles. It is the best place to get the Nooz, after all!

Did I just see what I thought I saw?

Then there were his Panda Defamation statements!!!!

truth
Foxxy “News” lies like a rug.
truth
Pandas COULD bite your head off if they really wanted to.
When the truth is found… to beeee lies….

While, I’m sure we have not seen the last of Barker, it is gratifying in a schaudenfreudenish way to know that there was actually a line, he crossed it, and got canned. Of course we know the line is how much money was his continued presence going to cost old Rupert, but still… I, for one, am happy that he is having a really bad day.

Alas, we know that there is much mischief this malignant man-child is capable of. I mean…if you thought TFG was bad. Could this be the shove that propels him into politics? I hope not, but the way things are going, I wouldn’t hold my breath for Glinda, the Good Witch of the North to show up any time soon.

Till next time…

Be the Bear!
Bob T I wasn’t the one who got fired today Panda

Insurrection Update!

Surely, you don’t want to rely on all that main stream media to hear the latest! No! You want a reliable NooZ source! One with Pandas! And cats!

You can always trust what a panda tells you!*

*Um…unless maybe if it’s Pinky or PPJ.

Hang on to your hats. It’s gonna be…um…well, you know.

Be the Bear
Bob T why isn’t this over Panda

Hey! Yes you! Did you know I have a new book collection of my ‘toons you read here? It’s Book 10 of The Panda Chronicles: Litter Box of Chaos – The Mittens years. Yes, its my political leaning ‘toons from the last 5 years and you can get it on Amazon!

If you like it, it really helps with visibility and sales if you leave a review. It doesn’t need to be long! One or two sentences saying you peed your pants you were laughing so hard or that coffee squirted out your nose. Thank you!

More about the so- called Sedition Panda

It hurts my fingers to type that phrase!

This is Panda Defamation. I’m pretty sure there is a law against that!

I mean if that P.A.B. (look it up in the Congressional Record) Ron DeSanctus wants to make bloggers who want to say mean things about him register with the state of Floriduh, it surely must be illegal to portray pandas in an unflattering way!

Be the Bear!
Bob T I’ll say anything I want about Floriduh Panda

The Year is Wrapping Up! Say Buh-Bye to 2022!

Bob is ever hopeful!

We can hardly stand the wait…

Keep your Indictment Advent calendar handy!

Be the Bear
Bob T hurry hurry hurry Panda

Don’t forget to check out the re-run of Beary Poppins over at my Substack NoozLetter!

Solidarity Forever!

I always like to say, there is no grudge like an old grudge, and this grudge is not only old enough to vote, it’s old enough to have grandchildren! Those who know me well, know that I worked at Starbucks, back in the mid 1980’s. Those who know me really well had to listen to me engage in hair on fire rants after Howard Schultz bought the company and immediately started to push to decertify the union we had formed in the year or so before he bought the company.

He’s learned a few things since that effort for better worker compensation and working conditions. (None of the things he’s learned are good BTW)

Let’s see what he’s learned…

A scene that has been re-created in PandaBucks Coffee cafes across the country!

Be the Bear
Bob T hey Howard, remember me?Panda

Who could ever foreseen this revelation at the January 6th hearing today?*

*Everyone

When I wrote this ‘toon last week, I had no idea that today’s hearing was coming.

Go figure.

In the words of Garry Trudeau…”GUILTY GUILTY GUILTY GUILTY!”

“New sh*t has come to light”
~the Dude

Be the Bear
Bob T Panda