Tag Archives: 2016 election

Here Comes Mittens

Oh yeah. Mittens the Cat is back and as I previously might have mentioned, once or twice, it is really hard to make stuff up when the stuff you read on the news is already so absurd. As the Nihilists said in The Big Leibowski, “It’s just not fair!” Oh, yeah, here comes Mittens the Cat!

The disappearance of Mr. Bun has taken a back seat to the debate between Princess Pinky, Bob T. Panda, and Mittens the Cat. Tell me when it’s all over…I don’t think I can bear to watch!

"You are all Losers!" - Mittens the Cat

“You are all Losers!” – Mittens the Cat

What’s that you say? Mittens bears some resemblance to one of this year’s Presidential candidates? Imagine that! well, if all of this year’s political shenanigans has got you down, get yourself a beer, some cuppycakes, and sit a spell and watch this video by my pal Doxiemom made of Bubba and his mom! I hear panda videos are very relaxing and we are going to need all the relaxing we can get this summer and fall!

Be the Bear,
Bob T Panda

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Attention Must be Paid

If Pinky is to survive until the election, attention must be paid to Mommee, because I think her patience has come to an end. Actually, I think all patience went out the window, several episodes ago, but Pinky just does not know when to give it a rest. Meanwhile, Bubba is having way too much fun with some cubbies closer to his own age, and Pinky is rethinking having such young minions. These Canadian minions are not falling in to line like the triplets did. It must be a result of having such a panda permissive head of government, who has been known to bounce little panda cubbies on his knees. I bet he reads bedtime stories to the twins too. Do you suppose he babysits when Er Shun and Da Mao want to have date night?

Bubba is having so much fun with his new friends!

Bubba is having so much fun with his new friends! These minions are not up to Pinky’s standards!

So, not that I’m complaining or anything, I have noticed, that when Pinky is behaving badly, there are far more views on the blog than when all the pandas are behaving themselves nicely. Just an observation, mind you, not a criticism or cause for concern. Perhaps people …er… pandas other than myself wish to unleash their inner cubby and join the bears behaving badly.

In honor of Mother’s day (and particularly Mei Xiang, long suffering mother of Pinky) I wanted to share with you Vicky Vladic’s post on panda moms (along with a very yummy sounding recipe) over at V Something Speaks. Enjoy!

There is more to come later this week on the ongoing international panda crisis. Stay tuned!

Be the Bear
Bob T Panda

How Did You Get This Number?

Poor Mei Xiang…when the phone rings, it is bound to be trouble, and it is bound to be about Pinky. She thought that only the Zoo Director and the President had this phone number, so well she might wonder, how did you get this number?

Meanwhile, back at the actual National Zoo, Pinky’s brother Bubba is going about the business of learning to be a panda, under the expert tutelage of his mother, who is also a panda. But what about Pinky? well….

"If Pinky is grounded, can I have her dessert?"

“If Pinky is grounded, can I have her dessert?”

I think you will be all as pleased as I am to see that Bubba is beginning to understand his sister a bit better, it should help him to resist her involving him in her schemes. Maybe. We’ll see, won’t we?

Just a reminder, Pandas International is having their Spring Auction right now, and I have donated one of the signed reproductions from Pandamorphosis to help support their work with pandas. So, if you were thinking you would like to support Pandas international AND get some of the art from Pandamorphosis, this is a win win for everyone! Because remember, without pandas, there could be no panda satire! Here’s the link! Thee’s lots of other cool items to bid on too. Most of it…um…has pandas on them.

Be the Bear
Bob T Panda

On the Campaign Trail

Editors note: Pinky has been sneaking around (unknown to her sainted mother) out on the campaign trail, and if The Very Bob T. Panda doesn’t get out there, even his three loyal supporters might go looking elsewhere with their votes.

I have not said much about the actual campaign atrocities that have been going on out there. It makes me too worried for our future so instead, I am concentrating on Bob and Pinky’s shenanigans. Much better for my blood pressure, and besides, Andy Borowitz does a much better job than I ever could (and he even snuck in a picture of Canadian Prime Minister Trudeau with a couple of pandas!)

But now, it’s time for things to get going panda-a-pando over at the Panda Chronicles debate headquarters.

"I thought I had until November." -Bob T Panda

“I thought I had until November.” -Bob T Panda

Pinky is ready to get down and get dirty.
Are you?

Be the Bear,
Bob T Panda

Pandas are not Solitary

Contrary to the conventional wisdom, pandas are not solitary animals, as scientists would have us believe. In fact many of them are on social media, with a veritable flood of them on Twitter! Princess Pinky has her own page, and Bubba has several. Recently Pinky and Bubba’s parents have gotten into the act, probably to make sure Pinky was not up to anything she shouldn’t be. I…ahem…heard that Inspector Panda has an account, but he forgot his password and hasn’t been able to find it.

Just a couple of days ago, a photograph of Canada’s new Prime Minister has hit the inter webs, …wait for it…with the extremely adorable Toronto panda twins on his lap. New Yorker writer Andy Borowitz has pointed out the dangers of allowing this photo to be publicized. Will Americans who chose to flee a potentially repressive regime come the November elections, be given a false sense of what Canada has to offer? (Free pandas for everyone!!!!!) And will we all have to take up the sport of curling?

Could all these Twitter accounts be real, with pandas pounding the keys of their laptops as they while away the hours behind the scenes? Or is something more sinister going on?

But they're so cute!

But they’re so cute!

To tell the truth, I did not know what a “sock puppet” account was, until recently. But wouldn’t it be fun, if they really did have to make puppets to use them?

Be the Bear!
Bob T Panda

Fabulous Furry Friday

This week, Fabulous Furry Friday looks at…(you know we had to do this, didn’t you?) The 2016 Election Season. Well, actually, it’s more like the 2012 election season that we are looking back on, since a certain candidate, who we will refer to as He Who Must Not Be Named, (or HWMNBN) was throwing verbal rocks at the previous failed Republican presidential candidate, calling him a loser and disgrace.

Now, I am no fan of the former Republican candidate, but he deserves respect, particularly from someone who wants to hold the office under consideration. (So does our current President, if you want my opinion.) Can’t we play nice, please? Pretty panda please?

Is it really all black and white?

Is it really all black and white?

Cats....you just can't trust em.

Cats….you just can’t trust em. Remember Mittens?

Keep cool, cat, and don't go blaming women for stuff. That is SO not the way to get votes...

Keep cool, cat, and don’t go blaming women for stuff. That is SO not the way to get votes…

And if debating with Mittens wasn’t bad enough, now Bob is facing Pinky in the primary fight of his life. The soul of the Panda Party is at stake!

What could Pinky be up to...?

What could Pinky be up to…?

Don't mess with Pinky.

Don’t mess with Pinky.

…and I real have to talk with my media team, because I don’t have a video yet, and Pinky’s has been shown all over the world!

Be the Bear and have a fabulous weekend!
Bob T Panda

Pinky has a Cunning Plan

Oh that Pinky! She snuck off to the Iowa caucuses, using Daddy’s credit cards and now there are rumors of her showing up in New Hampshire, as well as appearances scheduled in South Carolina! But what kind of cunning plan has she used so that no one will realize she has left the zoo?

And is her willingness to let Bubba play with Mr. Bun NOT a sign that Pinky has learned to share (as IF!!!!) but a way to buy his silence when she sneaks out of the zoo?

What do YOU think?

That Pinky is too clever for her own good!

That Pinky is too clever for her own good!

Meanwhile, after listening to the GOP “debates” on Saturday night, (didn’t I have anything better to do? Apparently not.) I think I can honestly say that having a roomful of baby pandas on stage would not have been any more unruly than what was happening before the world and everyone. I get that there are legitimate differences of opinions both between and within political parties. I have even (gasp!) voted for republicans in state elections. But I think that requiring participants of these “debates” to wear shock collars which would provide a mild but emphatic shock when the wearer lied, would have provided a more illuminating discussion.  Just saying.

You have a clear choice. #HeyWhyNotVote4Bob or #Vote4Pinky

We could do worse.

Be the Bear
Bob T Panda

Day 27: Countdown to the New Year Begins

Could it really be true? Could we be starting the countdown to the new year already?

Well, yes we could. In some ways the year flew by, and in other ways it was excruciatingly long. We have a new panda cub in Washington DC, twins in Toronto, and now the faintest glimmer of the possibility of pandas in the Pandacific Northwest. Huzzah!

And now, for the last new cartoon of the new year, I offer this, as my wish for the new year, probably guaranteed to delight and annoy, in equal measure. Feel free to tell me what you think in the comments, but I won’t post anything really mean or abusive. Other than  that, have at it!

Consider this my Werld Peez Pandifesto

Consider this my Werld Peez Pandifesto

No fairs unka bob, indeed!

Well, why the heck not?

Well, why the heck not?

Isn't that just the cutest thing?

Isn’t that just the cutest thing?

Vote for Pinky. Do YOU want to explain why you didn't?

Vote for Pinky. Do YOU want to explain why you didn’t?

Hey! Why NOT vote for Bob? Peace, prosperity, and buy stuff with pandas!
Be the Bear,
Bob T. Panda

Pinky Hits the Talk Shows!

These days, it’s not just news programs and debates where candidates try to get as much air time as they can! Yep, they all strive to get on as many talk shows as possible, so that voters see their “real people” (or is that “panda?”) sides.

And what better talk show is there, than Mehitabel Tonite!?

And what better talk show is there, than Mehitabel Tonite!?

Mehitabel knows how to get to the heart of the matter with her guests, don’t you think?

Be the Bear,
Bob T. Panda