Category Archives: the essential pandaness of being

Fabulous Furry Friday presents…

The best of Mittens the Cat! When we found out that Mittens was entering the race for president, we shook our collective heads in dismay. Hasn’t this election cycle gotten crazy enough? Fabulous Furry Friday presents: The Best of Mittens!

This. Will. Not. Stand!!!!

Ha ha! Of course it will. One thing we must remember, during this excruciating election season, and that is we need as much funny as possible, and all the better if we can make thinly veiled references (or maybe not so thinly veiled) about various political candidates. And laugh about it. Even if it’s through our grinding teeth.

For those of you who just recently joined the pandasphere, we bring you some cartoons starring Bob and Mittens from the previous presidential cycle. Pinky wasn’t even born yet, let alone vying for world domination!

Babette has ..um…toned her wardrobe down in honor of this important occasion.

In the words of Winnie ther Pooh, “I think it’s time for a little something.

Cats….you just can’t trust em.

Remember, Mittens has “excellent fur.”

Does being endangered have NO privileges?

Keep cool, cat, and don’t go blaming women for stuff. That is SO not the way to get votes…Endangered Species card? #DealMeIn

Hmmmm…I think that the raw materials to transform Mittens into the personality of one of the current candidates are all there. stay tuned! It’s going to get might pandy around here!

Be the Bear
Bob T. Panda

The Toronto Panda Twins Endorse…

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Rumors are flying around the headquarters of The Institute for Contemporary Panda Satire! Will Bob T concede the election? Does Princess Pinky have something up her sleeve? Will Bubba ever get Pinky to quit calling him “Boo Boo”? But the big news is that the Toronto Panda Twins are making their public debut on March 12! And they have made their decision as to whom to support in their neighbor nation to the south’s race to the top…

Be the bear, eh?

I don’t know why they don’t want to support a mature panda with lots of experience…um…doing stuff, but there you have it. If you planning on visiting the Toronto Twinkies, please send pictures to us here. and maybe you could give them a Why Not Vote 4 Bob flag. Just saying.

Be the Bear

Kung Fu Panda revisited

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Oh me, oh my, Friday night I went to see Kung Fu Panda 3 and the bears did not disappoint! If you haven’t seen the movie yet, (and I strongly urge you to go right this minute) and you don’t want to read any spoilers, I suggest you skip this section and head on down to today’s ‘toon, so I don’t ruin the experience for you.

I have to admit, I was a fledgling Pandaholic when the first Kung Fu Panda movie came out, and to put it mildly, I was skeptical, if not downright dismissive of the idea. Then I went to see it and all I can say is WOW! Goofy, but lovable Panda Po aside, the movie is a visual treat and movie 3 was no exception.

The film team even visited the panda kindergarten and went to the Chimelong Panda reserve to meet the worlds first surviving panda triplets, Mengmeng, Shuaishuai and Kuku (also known as Pinky’s minions) and gave them a cameo role in the movie.

Po travels to his long lost, unremembered home with his real panda dad to gain the vital panda knowledge needed to fight this movies’ supremely evil villain, and in the process discovers his roots and a whole lot of (wait for it) adorable baby pandas, not to mention a female panda that appears to have studied at Babette de Panda’s charm academy for young pandas ladies.

I laughed, I cried, I gasped with amazement. I can’t end this review without mentioning the incredible lushness and visual excitement of this movie. As a fine artist (besides being a panda satirist) I love movies that capitalize on relevant art styles and references. Nods to traditional Chinese painting and calligraphy, not to mention amazing color combinations and dynamic compositions make this movie an aesthetic, as well as a pandarific experience. If you can see it on a big screen, do it. Do it now.

And now, on with our Sunday feature ‘toon…

Huzzah! Pandas save the day!

Hope you enjoyed today’s cartoon, and do go see Kung Fu Panda 3. Heck. see all of them again! I know that I will! and I bet Po will get an Oscar tonight for best panda in a dramatic role, don’t you think?

Be the Bear!
Bob T Panda

Be the Bear

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I just listened to an interview with the guy who played the grizzly in the movie The Revenant, starring Leonardo DiCaprio and ahem…THE BEAR!!!!! Let me say right here that no matter how many well deserved Academy Awards this movie wins this weekend, I have no intention whatsoever of seeing this movie. This guy studied a lot of bear attacks, so he could…um…be the bear.

It was really interesting to hear about all of the preparation and mechanics/ technological magic that went in to making the scenes with the bear attack so realistic. If you’re interested, you might be able to catch the podcast on CBC’s Day Six.

However, I would never dream of boycotting movies containing …pandas. Um…KUNG FU PANDA 3!!! (which I have plans to see tonight!)

So, in honor of both the bear (yay!!!!!) from The Revenant and the Kung Fu Pandas, here are some being the bear related cartoons for your Fabulous Furry Friday Fun!

“Is it a documentary?”

Being the bears!

Huzzah! Bring pandas to Washington State!

Speaking of being mauled by bears…

Thanks again to Henry Nicholls for alerting me to this story

And I’ll be sure to let you know what I thought of Kung Fu Panda 3 after I see it tonight. I bet is going to get an Oscar for best panda in a dramatic role!

Be the BEAR,
Bob T Panda

Smile! You’re on Pandid Camera 2

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Poor Bubba. What a shock it was to find out that people had been watching him ALL. THE. TIME. on the panda camera. Are they really allowed to do that? I’m afraid so, Bubba, and what with your sister’s presidential aspirations, not to mention your Cubby of the Year Award, you won’t have a moments privacy during your entire residence at The Pinksonian Zoo.

Between Apps on mobile devices, 24 hour panda cams, and all the videos and photos taken by visitors to the zoo, your EVERY. SINGLE. MOVE. will be recorded and commented on. Not to make you self conscious or anything.

Add to that, the time honored tradition and privilege of older children to tease, torment, and generally one up their younger siblings. Not that I know anything about this. HAHAHAHAHA! For the record, I am the put upon younger sibling. But we are all done with that, right?

I has no sekrets!!!!

Meanwhile, over on Kristen Lamb’s blog, she has been taking to task those online news sites that make a practice of not paying writers. C Hope Clark, over at Funds for Writers (one of my favorite and always read newsletters) has also addressed this extremely disturbing trend. As a writer, painter, and cartoonist, I have come up against this idea that “if you love doing something, you should do it for free”. Phooey on that! As both Kristen and Hope have both so eloquently said, creative people have the same bills everyone else does. We have rent, mortgages, doctor bills, need food, clothes, you name it.

Now, I post this blog for free, and you can search the archives at will. I do this willingly. You can walk into the gallery that shows my paintings and see them for free. You can even see them online. The only way I make any income is if someone buys my paintings, books, or reproductions. If that truly is not in your budget, come visit here often; visit your public library. I’ve been there and I am a great fan an user of public libraries. But if you have the wherewithal to buy books or paintings, be they mine or any of the thousands of great writers and artists out there, please do. It will be appreciated and is the only way we keep from living in a cardboard box. Visit my book page or Pandas Love Links page. And don’t support sites that make money from the work of creatives without providing compensation to those who create the content.

Be the (slightly preachy) bear!
Bob T Panda

Pinky has a Cunning Plan

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Oh that Pinky! She snuck off to the Iowa caucuses, using Daddy’s credit cards and now there are rumors of her showing up in New Hampshire, as well as appearances scheduled in South Carolina! But what kind of cunning plan has she used so that no one will realize she has left the zoo?

And is her willingness to let Bubba play with Mr. Bun NOT a sign that Pinky has learned to share (as IF!!!!) but a way to buy his silence when she sneaks out of the zoo?

What do YOU think?

That Pinky is too clever for her own good!

Meanwhile, after listening to the GOP “debates” on Saturday night, (didn’t I have anything better to do? Apparently not.) I think I can honestly say that having a roomful of baby pandas on stage would not have been any more unruly than what was happening before the world and everyone. I get that there are legitimate differences of opinions both between and within political parties. I have even (gasp!) voted for republicans in state elections. But I think that requiring participants of these “debates” to wear shock collars which would provide a mild but emphatic shock when the wearer lied, would have provided a more illuminating discussion. Just saying.

You have a clear choice. #HeyWhyNotVote4Bob or #Vote4Pinky

We could do worse.

Be the Bear
Bob T Panda

What do you mean by “um”?

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A faithful reader, (okay, well, it was my brother,) suggested that I remind people just what WOOZPPAH stands for. So here I go: WOOZPPAH stands for WOOdlandpark Zoo Project PandaH… and I know, I know..there is no “H” at the end of ‘Panda’ but it seemed more festive with an ‘H’ at the end. Kind of like ” There is no ‘R’ in Washington,” as my friend Sandy Bradley always used to say on the old Potluck Show on Saturday mornings in a Wallingford tavern.

But, being that the word WOOZPPAH is kind of obscure, and you have to explain it every time you use it, we need a zippy hashtag so that our movement to bring pandas to Washington State, (or even better, Seattle, or even better than that, Whidbey Island, which while it doesn’t have a zoo, it does have any number of properties with out of control bamboo growing on them.)

If you’re just tuning in, check out our other ‘toons about WOOZPPAH here! And here!

We promise we’ll clean up after them and EVERYTHING! It won’t be like the thing with the goldfish, honest!

So put your thinking cap on and come up with some really good hastags for our campaign to bring pandas to Washington State. This is really, really important, because…um,,, well you are just going to have to take my word for it! It just is!

Tune in on Friday for more from the Princess Pinky Bridgegate scandal! Maybe she will have news about how she did at the Iowa Caucuses!

Be the Bear,
Bob T Panda

Woozppah Again!

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Surely you don’t think that now that there is even the faintest hope of Pandas to the Other Washington, that we would ever let this subject drop.

Never!

And by the way, while we have had …um…one (well three, but all by the same person) entry into our #FindAHashtag contest, we are hoping for a more enthusiastic response. Anyone? To refresh your memory, we need a Twitter hashtag for the WOOZPPAH movement, to bring pandas to Seattle. There’s a prize for the winning entry!

Meanwhile, the Eastern states (that already have pandas) are thawing out a bit and visitors are returning to the Pinksonian Zoo to visit Bubba, Pinky, and their parents. Many people hoped that papa bear Tian Tian would do a reprise of his snow fun video, but he turned his back to the crowd of cameras and reporters and …um…had a little snack. Hey! He’s a panda, and he’s a guy panda. Nothing gets between a guy panda and his snack, OKAY?????

Meanwhile, here is the latest from Woozppah!

If only we could have just a couple of pandas….

It will be so much fun to have pandas in Washington State! And if anyone knows how to contact the Washington State Panda Foundation, drop us a comment okay? Panda satire thrives on pandas, you know. And…um…cuppycakes, but that is another matter!

See you later this week for more from WOOZPPAH, and more on Fabulous Furry Friday about the Highwaygate Scandal.

Be the Bear,
Bob T. Panda

Pacific Northwest Pandas

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Ever since I became a pandaholic (I’m not ashamed of my love), one of the great causes for sadness in my life is the fact that I have to get on a plane if I want to go and visit pandas. Not that I have any wish to live in Washington DC, especially as they are in the grasp of Snomaggedon 2016, but why, oh why can’t we have pandas in Seattle?

Well, it turns out that people who can get things done are actually talking to folks in China who hand out pandas (the Office of Panda Procurement and Proliferation). We have no idea if they will be successful in bringing pandas to Washington State, but be assured that we are keeping our fuzzy ears to the ground on this one!

I bet Seattle Pandas would vote for Bob!

I can also attest to the fact that bamboo grows really well around here, so if there were Pacific Northwest Pandas they would have plenty of bamboo to choose from! The weather here is very conducive to panda proliferation, so what’s holding us back (I mean besides vast sums of money)? So, if you are a Seattle area millionaire with a fondness for the fuzzy black and white bears, now is the time to come forward and say “I want pandas!!!!!”

There remains only one crucial piece of this campaign to bring pandas to the Pacific Northwest and that is…(wait for it) a really good Twitter hashtag! Please add your suggestions for a Twitter hashtag to the comments section and I will give the contributor of the best hashtag suggestion a signed copy of my latest book, The Panda Chronicles Book 6: We R Endangered (sorry, US entrants only, but even if you don’t live in the US, please share your suggestions. I’ll come up with something less expensive to mail if you have the winning suggestion.)

Till next time!

Be the Bear!
Bob T. Panda

A late note: An alert reader brought to my attention, the news that Chuck Todd on Meet the Press not only played the video of Tian Tian frolicking in the snow, but suggested that maybe a panda should be president. I am not making this up. She thought it might be code for “Vote 4 Pinky” but it could just as easily be “Hey! Why not vote for Bob?”

Behind the Scenes at The Panda Chronicles

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You may wonder what the lives of The Panda Chronicles pandas are like when they are not on camera. Mr Wu, being a California bear, enjoys surfing and driving around in his cubvertable. The Meihem twins, besides being Panda Scouts, enjoy relaxing together and plotting ways to make Pinky mad.

And Pinky… well, Pinky likes to relax in her luxuriously appointed private quarters, while catching up on some educational reading.

What is Pinky reading?

And if you are wondering what your nearest and dearest would like for this year’s holiday, consider Pinky’s campaign swag!

Although why I am suggesting this instead of “Hey! Why not vote for Bob” merchandise is beyond me!

Aren’t we in enough trouble already?

Be the Bear
Bob T. Panda

Let the excesses of the season begin! It’s almost time for 31 Days of Pandas!