Tag Archives: panda kindergarten

Even more journalistic follies

If there is one thing we just cannot abide (the Dude, notwithstanding) it is people or …um…pandas, getting credit for something they did not do. But that is just what is going on here at Zoonooz headquarters. Some one is going to have to put a stop to these journalistic follies!

And then there is accidentally confessing to something you did do, but hoping that no one will believe you.

We KNEW that was you!

We KNEW that was you!

Is there more Meihem ahead?

What do you think?

Meanwhile, the panda season of looooove is heating up! More from the PSofL soon! And don’t forget! Today is the Ides of March. We don’t know what that is, but it sounds scary. Beware!

Be the Bear,
Bob T. Panda

The Panda Season of Love has Begun!

News from the San Diego Zoo, Department of panda whoopee reports that Bai Yun and her favorite stud muffin, Gao Gao, had a romantic encounter today. Mr Gao Gao has an advantage over most zoo pandas, in that he was wild born and so has better instincts and ….um…technique than…um…some other pandas we could name.

So in honor of the panda season of love, let’s have a few love pandas from the archives!

A panda by any other name, would smell...well, they would just smell...

A panda by any other name, would smell…well, they would just smell…

Prevaricating pandas perceived in pregnancy pastry ploy

Prevaricating pandas perceived in pregnancy pastry ploy

And who could forget the controversy surrounding figuring out who fathered miss Pinky?

Who's the bear???!!!

Who’s the bear???!!!

And what panda doesn’t need a little inspiration from some appropriate reading material?

We really need to more thoroughly check the panda kindergarten's reading list.

We really need to more thoroughly check the panda kindergarten’s reading list.

And what better way to celebrate the panda season of love, than buying all the books from the Panda Chronicles series. Um…just saying.

Have a great weekend!

Be the Bear
Bob T. Panda

Fabulous Furry Friday Presents Great News!

OK, unlike most of what we talk about here, this is totally serious and we are not making this up! The most recent panda census results are in and the wild panda population is up, possibly by as much as 17%. This is great news, because, well…pandas!

Not that we don’t make fun of serious things like the panda census. Of course, some people (and you know who you are, bro) might point out that China’s relationship to statistics is not um…entirely unlike that of the panda kindergarten.

Do we have to count panda adoption fees?

Do we have to count panda adoption fees?

Is it any wonder Bob has a sharp pain behind his ears?

And here is more panda fun…because…um…pandas!

Always read the directions...

Always read the directions…

And because our heads are filled with thoughts of cuppycakes….

I have extra frosting!

I smell frosting!

And because it’s that time of year….

Will Bob ever learn?  will Mehitabel ever get the better of the panda kindergarten?

Will Bob ever learn? will Mehitabel ever get the better of the panda kindergarten?

Let’s put pandas to work!
Be the Bear,
Bob T. Panda

We proudly support Pandas International, because without pandas, there could be no panda satire!

Parting is such sweet sorrow…

…between moms and baby pandas, especially for all of us watching Bao Bao and her mom Mei Xiang. Let’s be clear here: Pandas do not live in family units, and after cubs reach the point where they can eat bamboo like a big bear, it’s time for them to seek their fortune in the real world.

It is rather disconcerting for the folks watching at home on their panda cams, especially because the relationship between cubs and their mom is so sweet…at least, just before the time mom turns around and runs them off, sometimes quite aggressively. Parting is such sweet sorrow, only in the movies, not among bears.

But that’s in real life, and this is Panda Satire!

Just a reminder: repeat after me: this is fiction.

Just a reminder: repeat after me: this is fiction.

Does Pinky have a new friend and confidant? Stay tuned, oh panda satire fans!

BTW: I was just interviewed on The Inspokes blog, a blog for writers and illustrators of books for children. I hope you’ll pop over and give my interview about Pandamorphosis a read.

Huzzah!

Be the Bear,
Bob T. Panda

Who you calling fat (Tuesday)?

Yes, it’s Fabulous Furry friday, where we look back at our favorite examples from the Panda Chronicles archives! Huzzah!

This week holds several occasions of note, the first being Fat Tuesday (or as we like to call it around here, Extra Fluffy Tuesday), The Chinese Lunar New Year, and coming up on Sunday, The Academy Awards.

A note about the discrepancy as to whether this is the Year of the Sheep, Goat, or Ram: our friend over at Vsomethingspeaks wrote an excellent essay on just why there is no absolute agreement on this year’s designation. You can read all about it here, as well as get a new delicious sounding recipe! We stand our portrayal of the Year of the Sheep…because…um…pandas in sheep costumes, right?

Here’s our salute to Fat Tuesday!

We call it "extra Fluffy Tuesday" around here.

We call it “extra Fluffy Tuesday” around here.

Thank you for that interesting and yet wildly inaccurate history, Bob!

And here’s our nod to the Academy Awards:

What will Christopher Robin say about this?

What will Christopher Robin say about this?

After this weeks guest appearance of Richard Parker, how could we not celebrate both The Life of Pooh as well as The Life of Pie?

The Life of PIE....get it? *chortle chortle*

The Life of PIE….get it? *chortle chortle*

Have a fun filled weekend, everyone!

Be the Bear!
Bob T. Panda

Salute! To the Year of the Sheep

Once again, the panda kindergarten stages their annual Chinese New Year’s pageant, this year we salute the Year of the Sheep! I know! I know! Are you already picturing little chubby panda kindergarteners dressed up as fluffy little sheep? I know I am.

Of course, in some interpretations, it is The Year of the Ram or the Year of the Goat.

Just saying.

Look out!!!! Oh, those triplets!

Look out!!!! Oh, those triplets!

Really, there is nothing cuter than an upside down panda. Except maybe an upside down panda in a sheep costume.

Be the Bear
Bob T. Panda

More Pandas in the News

I did promise you that I had a veritable plethora of panda tales (or was that tails?…no matter) and here is another absolutely true story which, coincidentally enough, is about pandas! Huzzah!

I swear, I can’t make this stuff up.

Today’s story is a tale of treachery, of impostor pandas, of impersonation of their black and white fluffy goodness. Is that a panda I see before me?

Apparently not.

Here’s the actual news story, so that you know I am not making this up. That includes the quote by the spokesperson for the Animal Protection Party. Just saying. Quite frankly, Mehitabel has way too many rights around my house, if you ask me.

Well, it LOOKED like a panda...

Well, it LOOKED like a panda…

Stay tuned for more true stories and the panda kindergarten’s Chinese New Year Celebration coming up next week!

Be the Bear,
Bob T. Panda

Pandas in the News

Those of you who have been following the exploits of Bob and the panda kindergarten for some time know that I am exceedingly fond of real news stories that either feature pandas or can be subverted to somehow be about pandas, even when they are not.

Are you following all that?

Anyway, our first story comes to us courtesy of alert readers Sarajane Eppley and Karen Willie, who both alerted me to this story about pandas’ relationship with themselves, or more accurately their reflections in mirrors. BBC Earth brings us this story about a peculiar panda particular!

This is a job for panda satire!

Mirror, Mirror, on the wall, who is that handsome panda I see before me?

Mirror, Mirror, on the wall, who is that handsome panda I see before me?

Thanks again to Karen and Sarajane for alerting me to this story. Tune in on Wednesday for another story of pandas in the news!

Be the Bear,
Bob T. Panda

Chinese New Year Preview

It’s almost time for Chinese new Year, and once again the panda kindergarten will present their Salute to the New Year. That means it’s time for encore presentations of previous pandy kindy extravaganzas! Huzzah!

The year of the bunny.....

The year of the bunny…..

Oh that panda kindergarten!

Oh that panda kindergarten!

And then there was The Year of the Dragon….

the year of the dragon, panda kindergarten

Huzzah! it’s the year of the Dragon!

Not to mention another of Bob’s literary attempts at greatness, inspired by the Year of the Dragon….

What do you mean by "was?"

What do you mean by “was?”

And then we skipped the year of the Snake, because…um…snakes?

So then it was on to the Year of the Horse. Huzzah!

panda cubs on rocking horses

Huzzah! It’s The year of Pandas on Horsies!

I want to know when it will be the Year of the Panda? I mean, come on…pandas come from China, and yet we have no year of the PANDA!!!!!!!????

Mehitabel’s note: Pfft! Seems to me that around here it is ALWAYS the year of the panda. Get over it!

So stay tuned for this years salute to The Year of the Sheep! And (here comes the commercial!) remember that it can be the year of the panda everyday when you support The Panda Chronicles by buying our books! Huzzah! Thank you all who support us this way.

Be the Bear,
Bob T. Panda

The Giant Panda Zoo Awards Part 1

Welcome to the event you have all been waiting for! No, it’s not the Super Bowl, although I have heard that it might be happening sometime soon.*  Yes, it’s the Giant Panda Zoo Awards, with your hosts, Babette de Panda, and the actual creator of the Giant Panda Zoo Awards, Jeroen Jacobs. I warned him that I draw pandas much better than I draw people, so if he looks like maybe he might be a panda, I apologize in advance.

Unlike the real world where pandas don’t get much opportunity to socialize with one another, in the world of panda satire and panda stories, pandas really get around a lot. I know, I know, we anthropomorphize pandas and all our pets as well, but heck… why not? Why shouldn’t pandas get to travel and attend award ceremonies? Don’t answer that.

Meanwhile, on with the awards ceremony!

Huzzah!

Introducing Princess Dumpling

Introducing Princess Dumpling

We apologize to anyone who is offended by gratuitous panda butt depictions…oh wait…no we don’t.

* Actually, we do know that the Super Bowl is being played today. We even know who is playing!

Be the Bear!
Bob T. Panda