Well, the torch bears are at it again. Will they reach the Olympic Games in London in time? And what does dinosaur flatulence have to do with pandas? Tune in and see…..
Never underestimate the power of a good “fart joke”
Frommage, indeed!
Be the bear (oops)
Bob T. Panda
Did you know that it was 40 years ago today that the Nixon Pandas arrived at the National Zoo? I thought not. Recently, as a result of the Freedom of Information Act, transcripts of communications between pandas have come to light. Of course, this was in the days before email existed, so the discovery of these documents is quite exciting as well as unexpected. We now bring you the transcripts, known as The Panda Chronicles. (Now you know where we got our name.)
April 16, 1972: from the diary of Hua Mu, secretary of the Council of Pandas:
Well I am just fit to be tied. We had a big meeting last night to vote on which pandas were going to travel to Washington DC, but when the meeting started, it turned out that it had already been decided. I was so disappointed! I thought for sure I was going to get to go. After all, my great-great-great auntie on my mother’s father’s second cousin’s side of the family was none other than Su-Lin, the first panda to travel to America (and ride in a taxi!).
It turns out that Tsing Tsing was a political crony of none other than Richard M. Nixon, and they had worked out the deal while Nixon was in China, behind all the other pandas’ backs. Well, of course if Tsing got to go, Ling-Ling would be selected as his traveling companion. I have it on GOOD authority that Tsing Tsing had a couple other girlfriends that really wanted to go, but Ling Ling stamped her little paws and whispered something in Tsing’s ear that he didn’t repeat, but he just said his mind was made up and that Ling Ling would accompany him to DC. I’m not sure that anyone else knew that this was a permanent relocation, except for Tsing, who always had his paw in the cookie jar.
I hope he knows what he’s doing. Those personal appearances can be very tiring.
Well, time for bed, more tomorrow!
Be the bear!
Bob T. Panda!
There has been news of panda frolics all over the internet lately… well, at least where the pandarazzi lurk, that is. Rumor has it that Sunshine and Sweetie have called it quits as far a parenthood this year. What with moving into a new home, (“try finding a plumber or a decorator in a new town…I ask you!”) it seems that the two day “window of opportunity” was a little too short to “get the job done.” Other panda pairs are perhaps having better luck in this department.
Maybe a silly little love song would have helped things move along in Scotland. Well, there’s always next year!
I hope people haven't had enough of silly love songs!
Be the Bear!
Bob T. Panda
Doesn’t the thought of roly poly pandas on a date just tickle your fancy? But what does say, a panda at the Edinburgh Zoo have to do so that he will be desirable to his lady love? According to one of the zoo panda specialists, he needs to be put on an exercise program. I am NOT making this up. I heard it on the BBC. I think it maybe went something like this:
A panda by any other name, would smell...well, they would just smell...
More from the Scottish pandas later this week!
Be the Bear!
Bob T. Panda
…why can’t a cartoon panda? Why indeed. I ask you? I just read in Publisher’s Lunch that Uggie, the star of the movie The Artist, is writing his autobiography. I imagine he’s getting some help with the typing. I mean, Jack Russell Terriers are smart, but they’re not that smart. Well, you may remember that I HAVE written my autobiography already! surely you remember my great literary masterpiece, Black and White Like Me ?
More literature of the panda!
Wouldn’t you rather read about me than a dog…even if he is a movie star?
Be the Bear!
Bob T. Panda
PS: We did NOT win the Mega Million Lottery this weekend. There goes my dream of a giant cuppycake warehouse to help feed hungry pandas. Sigh….
News on the street is that perhaps the “festivities” (we are a family friendly cartoon feature…um… mostly) that took place at the San Diego Zoo earlier this week may have some adorable dividends. Bai Yun is not telling, although Gao Gao has a bit of a smirk, and keepers reported hearing him mumbling, “Whose da bear? I’m bad, I’m bad, I still got it…” under his breath as he did handstands and relaxed in his hot-tub. We won’t know for sure until much later this year, as pandas are notoriously tight-lipped on this subject, as well as unpredictable.
While we wait for our resident chronicler of pandas (will you get on it, and get off the darn computer and DRAW for cryin’ out loud?) to finish the latest cartoon, here is an old favorite on the subject of panda parenthood.
will the pitter patter of little paws soon follow?
Till we know more,
Be the Bear
Bob T. Panda
It is spring time and pandas are in the mood for loooooove. From San Diego Z00 (where they let the panda cam show some RATHER personal stuff, if you ask me, to Edinburgh, Scotland, where the happy (panda) couple have been hired to promote….deodorant. No, I am not making this up. The Royal Zoo in Edinburgh Scotland has played let’s make a deal with manufacturers of deodorant, to have the Scottish Pandas appear in their advertising. I can’t make stuff up this good, no way. Since I am not able to receive TV commercials from Scotland, it was, however, left to my imagination to bring you the commercial. (OK, I DID make this up.)
A bear by any other name, would still smell pretty funky.
Stay tuned this week for more panda product placement!
Be the Bear
Bob T. Panda
Before we get to our feature presentation today, I’d like to give myself and all the pandas (AND MEHITABEL, didn’t you mean to say?) a quick pat on the head because we are less than 300 visits away from reaching 20,000 visits to The Panda Chronicles. I don’t know what this means in the real world, except that maybe you, dear reader, are coming back again and again and telling your friends, or mentioning it on your blogs. So whatever your doing, thanks. Be the Bear!
Run,kitty, run!
A big thanks and a Roll of Honor entry to Linda M. for her suggestion relating to cats and toilet paper! You da bear!
Bob T. Panda
Note: No cats were actually harmed during the making of this cartoon, although they definitely were offended.
Yes it’s true, I am not a cartoon panda (sorry if I’ve surprised or disappointed anyone) and I really do have a Kickstarter project that still has a long way to meet my funding goals in only 7 days. I usually don’t cross pollinate my blogs, or the different parts of my creative life, but I’m making an exception here. Please check out my project at the following link. Even if you can’t help, maybe the extra traffic will encourage the folks at Kickstarter to give me a little extra exposure, so please visit and recommend to your friends and readers, if you see fit. Here’s the link:
http://www.kickstarter.com/projects/arttraveler/painting-from-the-source-the-inspiration-of-italy
We now return to our regular scheduled silliness. You are all the Bears for following the Panda Chronicles. It’s thanks to you all that I am about to reach 20,000 visits! (or maybe my brother visited 20,000 times?)
Bob T. (not really a panda, but let’s pretend) Panda
We here at the Institute for Contemporary Panda Satire are pleased and excited to announce that our new fil-um, Your Brain on Pandas: the Movie, is now showing on Youtube, and not only that, it’s been nominated for an Oscar! (In the category of Best 2 minute film about cartoon pandas.) be sure to watch it at:
We will be back later this evening when our lazy and indolent cartoon-ographer brings you the story of Pandas Fat Tuesday. (OK, OK, every day is fat something for pandas, but no need to rub it in!)
Till then, here is an earlier panda movie that had rave reviews:
Till tonight,
Be the Bear!
Bob T. Panda