Tag Archives: be the bear

The Deep, Dark Secret of Bebe Maurice’s Maman!

Pandas have secrets, okay? They are bears of mystery, with questionable pasts and unrepentant ancestors. Just because we’re cute, it doesn’t mean we’re easy, alright?

But what is the secret history the Bebe Maurice’s Maman has tried so hard to keep hidden? And who do they think they are fooling with those cheesy, fake french accents?

We are pandas of mystery!

Could Bebe Maurice and his Maman be related to that most celebrated (and feared!!!!) panda of mystery, the notorious Babette de Panda?

Viva les Pandas!
Bob T Panda

It is the birthday season of Bebe Maurice!

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We are taking a short break from Pinky in Wonderland (don’t worry! She will be back) to share some ‘toons about OTHER pandas (Pinky: what? there are OTHER pandas? dis can’t be right! plus dere is dat “share” word again! dis will not stand!!!!!!) It is time to celebrate the first birthday of France’s first baby panda, Bebe Maurice! people are saying, “Bebe Maurice needs an outfit! He needs a raison detre’! Or a raisin cookie! Whatebber!”

Here he is, in a three part special presentation!

Of COURSE he would be an artist! But what are the secrets of his maman?

Happy Bearday, Bebe Maurice!

A note about buying my books on Amazon: I was reading a post on the Digital Reader, one of my favorite website/blogs for what’s what in the publishing and tech industries, and Nate wrote an article about used books that are sold by third party sellers via the Amazon website. For those who are looking for a bargain, buying used books is a great way to add to your TBR pile without breaking the bank. The interesting thing was that some used books were selling for HUGE prices, way beyond the cover price of the book!

So, of course I had to go look…

I don’t make any money when a third party seller sells my book as used. If it is a lesser price, and you trust the seller (Like a friends of the library sale) I say go for it. But I’ve seen used books for sale (mine, I’m talking about) for higher than the cover price of a new book. This is nuts, in my opinion. There was one listed at over $500 (seriously nuts!) If you want to pay that much for one of my books, contact me and I will sell you an extremely overpriced book! (Just kidding. I think)

If you want to support me, buy a new book directly Amazon, so I get paid. I wish they were in independent bookstores so you could support them, but they are not. It would cost me more in time and money to get them there, as an independent publisher, than I would make from them. Hopefully, this will change when my graphic novel and picture books get picked up and published. Pseudo thumbs crossed!

If you want to buy a set of my 8 books, signed, directly from me, we can do that too. And you can always support my work via my Pandreon page! Pandas are standing by!

And in case you didn’t know, it is time for the Tour de France! Just in time for Bebe Maurice’s Bearday! Huzzah!

Didn’t we tell you not to do this?

Viva le Panda!
Bob T Panda!

Fabulous Furry Friday…um I mean FriBEI!!!!

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We are headed in to the high season of the panda birthday season, and it is never too early to start celebrating the July 29th birthday of the one, the only, the most adorable panda EBBER, the real Wu Self! He was my first baby panda, and so he’ll always be most special to me. Pinky may rant and rage about this, but what can I say? My heart will always belong to Wu!

Let’s get started! WuWuWuWu WU-HOOOOOOO!

“Howdy do! I’m Mr. Wu! Who are you?”

“Wu calls his dance, ‘Ode to a Weaf’ “

Thank you all for coming! Buy my book here!

Yo ho ho and a bottle of BooBeer!

“You are right and Wu is wrong…I’ll never do it again, mommy.”

You can read all about ALL of Mr. Wu’s adventures in his very own (almost Pinky free) book, The Panda Chronicles Book 4: The Book of Wu, available at a computer terminal near you!

And be sure to check out my new Pandreon Page, for those of you who would like to do more to support panda satire! It comes with a super secret page just for panda satire supporters!

Keep supporting panda satire, calling your Congressional representatives, and fighting fascism and injustice! It’s a tough job, but somebody’s gotta do it.

BE THE BEAR!
Bob T -not-an-enemy-of-the-people- Panda

Pinky in Wonderland Episode 9

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After today’s episode, we are going to take a little break from our story (don’t worry! it will be back!) as I have some very impatient pandas who are saying, “but what about US??? Aren’t WEE as important as Pinky?”

I value my life too much to answer that question.

But on with the show. I think we all need to take a deep breath and process what revelations were revealed this week, check our voter registration, and remember what’s important.

Pinky. Pinky is important.

What could be behind that door? Stay tuned, panda fans!

In addition to the fall of western civilization as we have known it, I received news that a dear friend has passed away this week. I met her almost 20 years ago, not long after I started spending time with my friend Mr. Badger. I hate that this gentle soul is no longer on this earth to remind me of what is important. She’d started having trouble keeping her balance, and soon her mind started to wander off to places we could not follow. I don’t know what comes after death, but I will continue to hope it is something like this:

As you know, pandas are big fans of Shakespeare.

Panda on
Bob T Panda

Happy Bearday to the Meihems!!!

But first, let’s have the next episode of Pinky in Wonderland!

We know just how you feel, Pinky. We feel the same.

Now, let’s have a little Meihem!!!

There must be cake!

And who is this mysterious ally of whom they speak?

The forces of Meihem are only barely in check.

Can you believe those Meihems? blaming everything on Pinky?

Happy Birthday Mei Lun and Mei Huan (aka Bert and Ernie in the pages of The Panda Chronicles. Read all about it in Pandapocalypse NOW! Book 5 of the Panda Chronicles!) And if you’re not already following me on Twidder (@PandaChronicle) what are you waiting for?

Meanwhile, You Know Who continues to embarrass us in the UK (which according to him, is known by many names, but most people don’t know that.) I’m surprised the Queen did not give him his tea in a “to go” cup. I don’t know what is going to happen when he meets Poot’n tomorrow, but I can’t imagine it will be good.

Best to keep watching panda videos. I hear they are very relaxing.

Pandas to the People
Bob-not an enemy of the people-T Panda

Fabulous Furry FriBei the 13th

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From now on, Fabulous Furry Friday will be known as Fabulous Furry FriBei, in honor of our favorite DC Panda boy, Bei Bei, known to his Panda Chronicle Fans as Bubba!

Meanwhile, back at the ranch, an alert Twidder friend posted this news about three suspected rhino poachers being…wait for it…eaten by lions! The original story I saw was by The New York Post, which is sometimes…um… of questionable veracity, but when I searched for the story this morning, I found citations by the NY Times and the BBC, among others, so, I’m going with it! Of course, that brings to mind this group of ‘toons chronicling another instance of animals taking matter into their own paws.

Karma is such a bitch!

What goes around, comes around.

You just can’t trust crocodiles.

Don’t be endangered, be dangerous

And our favorite…Whatever Happened to KittySue?

Want to know how KittySue “disappeared? Buy my book The Pinky Defense and find out! Buy the rest of them while your at it! Paper doesn’t grow on trees, you know! 😀

We are heading in to American Panda birthday season! Stay tuned to celebrate all our junior pandas!

While we are on the topic of making the world safer for animals, we also must bid a not so fond farewell to Scott Pruitt, former “head” of the EPA (Eradication of Population Agency) as his petty (and not so petty) alleged thievery got to be too embarrassing for #45 in the run up to the 2018 elections. Never fear, because you know who wants to nominate an actual coal industry lobbyist to the post. It’s not like we thought things were going to get better, right?

#PandasResist
Bob T Panda

Episode 7: Pinky in Wonderland

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While He Who Must Not Be Named continues to burn the country down, and pardons others who do so, we must not lose sight of the sight of the fact that pandas are very calming and maybe we should all go lie down and watch some panda videos…mebbee have some cuppycakes…oh yeah and VOTE and CALL YOUR SENATORS (ESPECIALLY THOSE WITH ‘R’ SENATORS) and tell them not to set back the country 50 years because that would just stink.

So let’s just give reality a rest, shall we? And tune in to the next episode of Pinky in Wonderland!!!

It would be better with a little salt and balsamic vinegar, but not bad!

And let’s all wave BuhBye to Scotty (sticky fingers) Pruitt. Unfortunately the new guy is a former coal industry lobbyist, Ah…to live in Wonderland with Pinky…that would be much better.

Be the Bear!
Bob T Panda

Episode 6: Pinky in Wonderland

Pinky in Wonderland!!!!

Well dis is a pickle an’ a half!

Be the bear!
Bob T Panda

Fabulous Furry Friday Presents…

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I’m sure there are people who have most of this week off, or at least part of it off any way, because of the July 4th holiday. That is not the case here, because
A) I am self employed
B) If I took a week off people would be like, “where are my pandas??? I NEED my PANDAS!!!!!!

But don’t cry for me Argentina…

If I had a week off, what in the heck would I do with it? Draw pandas? Clean my house (nah…never that! How do you think I have so much time to draw pandas?)

Meanwhile, here is a holiday classic for the 4th of July!

uh. oh.

In addition to the #secondcivilwarletter posts over at Twidder, we couldn’t help but notice a certain Senator lamenting that lack of civility and a perfidious preponderance of profanity (pretty good alliteration, wouldn’t you say?) So, in answer, we offer this ‘toon!

Well *bleep* and take your *bleep* and stick it *bleep*!!!!

And of course, once again, it is time for the Tour d’France to take place, and we have this to say about that, as well as other selfie opportunities!

Hey! Get out of the way!

Much better to take a selfie with pandas!

You know we’re just kidding about this, right?

AAAAAAhhhHHHHHH!

I really had no idea what she was up to.

And of course, who could forget Pinky’s visit to the White House?

Mei should not be getting all excited like this in her condition!

Meanwhile, the National Zoo is on Mei Watch. We hope she has a happy, healthy cubby (or two!) but no matter what, we hope that she will continue being her lovable self right in DC. There have been reports that Bao Bao herself might be on pregnancy watch. We shall see!

#PandasResist
Bob T Panda
Captain of the Cuppycake Brigade
Second Civility War

Episode 5: Pinky in Wonderland

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What’s with all that bombing going on out there?

I hope everyone is having a lovely 4th of July holiday, for those who celebrate (and for those of you who have a day off from your various labors. There are no paid holidays among the self employed, you know!) The right wing propaganda media has claimed that today is the beginning of the second Civil War. Would that be the War on Civility, or did they have something else in mind?

I am endlessly entertained and cheered by the Writers of Twitter, who are whooping things up with their #secondcivilwarletter parodies over on Twidder. If you are a partaker in all things tweeting, I highly recommend getting yourself over to read the many #secondcivilwarletter offerings and maybe take a crack at writing your own! It’s really fun.

Creativity lives! And so does Pinky…on with our story!

Drink mee!

#PandasResist
General Bob T Panda; Biscotti division of the Bamboo Irregulars