Tag Archives: cuppycakes

Fabulous Furry Friday: #WeREndangered!

Sunday’s cartoon was a lot of fun for me, and not just because of my coffee slinging history. I like it when Mehitabel has a chance to wig out and give the pandas a little what for.

Several people wrote in their comments that they would love to have a #WeREndangered coffee mug too, so I got right on it. I have a very neglected Cafe Press store, where you can buy things with various members of the Panda Chronicles on them. I know it is really time for some updated inventory, but only so many hours of the day and all that, you know.

I’ve long been wanting to design something with the Pandy Kindy in their Fez Mobile (or as I like to call it, their mobile fez-book app) and it occurred to me that this was the perfect place!

What could be more endangered than joyriding pandas NOT wearing seat belts?

Because I love the idea that people can find my pandas here and read them for free, I try not to lean too heavily on the potential money making aspects of panda satire, because, that would be …um…annoying. However, making a little filthy lucre from selling books and panda satire products, does make it possible for me to keep doing this. At least until I get a MacArthur Genius Grant for Panda Satire, at which time I will just leave piles of my books on street corners for anyone who wants them…

And lest we forget that there STILL is no MacArthur Grant for Panda Satire….

So head over to the Cafe Press Pandyland store and order a couple of #WeREndangered coffee mugs! Heck! order a bunch for all your friends, and remember, without pandas, there can be no panda satire!

And to support pandas further, for every #WeREndangered mug that is ordered during the rest of April, we will make a liddle donation to Pandas International, because they are actually doing stuff to support pandas (and not just making fun of them like some people!)

Thanks for being the bear! Stay tuned to this station for some exciting announcements in the very near future, about panda princesses political perpetrations!

Bob T. Panda

#WeREndangered

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As a recovering former employee of the largest coffee chain in the galaxy, it was with great amusement that I read of their campaign to “instigate meaningful dialog about racism.” Not that this country doesn’t need some meaningful dialog on this issue, but the vehicle chosen by this particular industry was, at best, not well considered, and at worst….well, just saying….

As someone who worked for many years behind the counters of food and coffee establishments, I can say with a good amount of certainty, that the last thing someone who is standing in line waiting for their coffee in the morning is meaningful dialog beyond “large, leave room for cream, make that a double.” It’s bad enough to be behind the person who orders a “half caff, skim almond milk, extra foam, sprinkle of yak butter, cinnamon, caramel pandachino” let alone have to wait for them to have meaningful dialog about anything.

And I can pretty much guarantee that the barista, gazing at the line of 20+ people who have not had their coffee yet, does not want any more meaningful dialog beyond, “will that be cash, charge, or your first born?”

So, really, if you want to do something meaningful to eliminate racism, sexism, or intolerance of any kind, wouldn’t it be more meaningful to um…hire more people of color, or diverse life style choices in upper management level positions, for example? What do ya say, Howard?

Please note: we just read of Starbuck’s pledge to support Gay Marriage, which we applaud, and in the spirit of this announcement, we cordially invite anyone who really hates this idea to quit reading The Panda Chronicles. Pandas are in favor of tolerance, you know.

Meanwhile, we invite you to take part in our #WeREndangered campaign, and engage in our own brand of meaningful dialog*

*Making fun of pandas

This was way too much fun. :o)

Can I have my coffee now?

Be the Bear!
Bob T. Panda

OMG It’s Tax Time!

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The Panda Revenue Service wants YOU! Because once again, at least in the United S of A, it is tax time, which means hand over that wallet!! Fortunately, the Panda Kindergarten Accounting Service is ready, willing and…um…well, while not exactly able, they do have an adding machine…to help you with your calculations.

They will be looking very closely at the returns of any known cats, as you may well imagine, because …um CATS!!!!!!

Will Bob ever learn? Will Mehitabel ever get the better of the panda kindergarten?

And because it is good to have something to laugh at through your tears, here are some of our other favorites to help you procrastinate just a little longer this weekend!

And it was ever thus….

Much better to take a selfie with pandas!

Princess Pinky helps with new years resolutions

You say you want a resolution, well, you know, it is hard to change a bear….I love Pinky when she is sorry she did something.

And if you want to get into some serious procrastination this weekend, wouldn’t it be a good idea to order all the http://www.yourbrainonpandas.com/book-table/ for your very own? They contain HOURS of procrastinatory panda goodness!

Okay then….where did I put my income records?

Be the Bear,
Bob T. Panda

Fabulous Furry Friday Salutes…

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…Easter! Bring on the marshmallow peeps, the malted milk candy covered Easter eggs, the chocolate pandas and…what…wait…

What do you mean there are no chocolate pandas for my Easter basket. Only BUNNIES????? I thought Easter was all about pandas! and how the Easter Panda brings treats to all the good little girls and boys….

What’s Black and White and carries cuppycakes in a basket?

Of course, once certain members of the panda kindergarten came on the scene, the tradition became more of …um…a trick or treat kind of experience.

A tiskitt a taskitt , a great big wheelie basket!

Once again, Fabulous Furry Friday brings you the REAL story!

Be the (Easter) Bear!
Bob T. Panda

Fabulous Furry Friday Presents Great News!

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OK, unlike most of what we talk about here, this is totally serious and we are not making this up! The most recent panda census results are in and the wild panda population is up, possibly by as much as 17%. This is great news, because, well…pandas!

Not that we don’t make fun of serious things like the panda census. Of course, some people (and you know who you are, bro) might point out that China’s relationship to statistics is not um…entirely unlike that of the panda kindergarten.

Do we have to count panda adoption fees?

Is it any wonder Bob has a sharp pain behind his ears?

And here is more panda fun…because…um…pandas!

Always read the directions…

And because our heads are filled with thoughts of cuppycakes….

I smell frosting!

And because it’s that time of year….

Will Bob ever learn? will Mehitabel ever get the better of the panda kindergarten?

Let’s put pandas to work!
Be the Bear,
Bob T. Panda

We proudly support Pandas International, because without pandas, there could be no panda satire!

What could be more Fabulous than Friday?

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Next week we take a look at The Giant Panda Zoo Awards ceremony and all your favorite pandas will be there! Will Pinky attempt to wrestle the gold medal for Panda Personality of the Year away from her cousin, Princess Dumpling? Does Babette de Panda have something up her haute couture sleeve to disrupt the ceremony? What skullduggery will Inspector Panda and his very clever assistant Mr. Wu uncover? Did Mei Xiang hide Pinky’s magical wand so she can’t…um…make adjustments to the awards?

Stay tuned till Sunday, when all will be revealed. We thought we would share some of Pinky’s triumphs and moments of glory to get you in the mood.

Uh oh! This year they only got BRONZE in bestie habitat!

“Do you know who I am????” Yeah, we do.

Beware, the power of the paw!

Princess Pinky is drawing a line in the sandbox.

Pinky answers difficult questions from the press in her own way.

Have a Fabulous Furry Friday! And don’t forget, your purchase of all of the Panda Chronicle Books (and Pandamorphosis) helps to keep the panda satire coming your way. Not to mention that you can have panda fun at home seven days a week. Huzzah!

And, if you love the artwork of Pandamorphosis, prints of all the major images from the book are available from my page at The Gratitude Gallery website. Check ’em out! You might also enjoy visiting some of our friends, pandas and not, from our Pandas Love Links page. Tell em we said “Hi!”

Tea Time for Pandas

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In our never ending quest to bring culture to the panda kindergarten, Bob decides to introduce them to the quintessential English High Tea, complete with little cucumber sandwiches and…um…cuppycakes. It is tea time for pandas!

The long, dark tea time of the soul….

I think it is time for a little something! I feel rather 11 o’clock-ish.

Just a reminder to stay tuned to this station on your internet dial, as next week we bring you more from the Giant Panda Zoo Awards! Interviews with award winning pandas, as they walk on the red carpet and pass through the velvet ropes, keeping the riff-raff away (and of course, by riff-raff, we mean anyone who isn’t Pinky)

Get ready for a star studded evening as all the nominated pandas strut their stuff for their fans.

Till then, Be the Bear!
Bob T. Panda

Bao Bao Responds to Her Defeat…

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Today, our nation’s number one panda, Bao Bao responds to her stunning defeat in this years Giant Panda Zoo Awards. The GPZA is a little like the Acadamy Awards, for pandas, so it’s easy to see why little miss Pinky would be so um…shall we say agitated? by her disappointing showing in this year’s voting.

But first, we have a story of sordid deception, tragedy, sugar overload, unfair advantage and death by chocolate, brought to our attention by one of our alert readers, Ms Jayelle of Brooklyn NY, about some hunting practices that IMHO are just the tiniest bit unfair, not to mention not very sporting. Now before anyone gets their panties in a knot, let me say I am an unashamed carnivore, or I suppose more accurately, omnivore. I have friends and neighbors who hunt deer and elk and stock their freezers to feed their family for the winter.

I say bravo, and that they are more honest eaters than I am, as the only hunting I do is for what’s on sale at our local grocery store. But this tale, from the bear centric area of New Hampshire smacks of unfairness to me. I mean, who doesn’t know that bears love sweets, and that chocolate can kill your dog if he eats enough of it. So, in the spirit of the Panda Chronicles, (meaning that we make fun of stuff, no matter how serious it actually is) here is our response to this story.

If I have but one life to live, let me give it for a cuppycake.

And now, as promised, Princess Pinky’s first response to the news that she did not win the gold medal in the Giant Panda Zoo Awards, (despite her…um…best efforts)

You might want to cover your ears.

Don’t tell me you’re surprised.

We’ll have more from our recorded coverage of the actual Giant Panda Awards ceremony, coming to you on The Panda Channel, host of Zoonooz, in the weeks to come. Stay tuned so you don’t miss it, or better yet, sign up to get new posts three times a week in your inbox. You can also sign up for our monthly (I swear I am going to get to this really soon) Newsletter. Both sign-ups are at the top of the right hand column on all pages, except for the home page.

Be the bear!
Bob T. Panda

You can bring a bear to culture…

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…but you can’t make them behave themselves.

You know the old saying, you can bring a bear to culture, but you can’t make them learn the ancient rites of the tea ceremony, but that doesn’t stop Bob from trying to bring culture and refinement to the panda kindergarten. I can hardly write that last sentence without snorting and giggling madly. Some how, “culture and refinement” used in the same sentence as “panda kindergarten” invokes the image of merriment and …um…Meihem.

You can lead a bear to culture, but….

Hmmm…Bob will have to call on his inner panda to recover from this learning experience with the panda kindergarten. As you may have noticed, Pinky and the Meihems are now full members in good (or is that bad?) standing in the panda kindergarten. Pinky was a first round draft pick.

I can’t let the Martin Luther King Jr. Holiday go by, without mentioning that it marks my 27th year of creative self employment. While I have had to be even more creative in the last six years in the making a living part, it has been an excellent ride, and I wouldn’t have it any other way. In fact, had the economy not gone sideways, panda satire might never have come into existence! And isn’t that a thought that would keep you up at night?

Keep Being the bear. I couldn’t do it without you.
Bob T. Panda

Pinky’s Snow Day; Part ‘C’

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The liddle pandas have come in and hung up their coats, taken off their boots, and settled in for a little refreshment! What is a snow day without a steaming cup of cocoa?

Meanwhile, all seems to be quiet on the Northwestern front. Progress is being made on another pending project, The Panda Chronicles Cuppycake Cookbook: Favorite Recipes of the Panda Kindergarten. This is a project that has been in the works (between other projects) for a little over a year, with panda and panda satire aficionado Vicky Vladic, who hails from Australia. You can read more about her over at her blog, VSomethingSpeaks.

You might say that this collaboration is a child of the internet, since I have never been to Australia and I’m pretty sure she’s never been to the Pacific Northwest Washington State. We never would have met, let alone have an easy way to work on a project together, were it not for the world wide cyber living room, where you can find just about anything…even pandas! Stay tuned to this here site, if you like pandas and cuppycakes (and let’s face it, who doesn’t like frosting?)

But now, there are some pandas waiting!

Well, they did hang their coats up.

The way of the princess never runs smoothly.

Be the Bear,
Bob T. Panda