One of the best things about writing fiction is that you can make things come out how you would like. Alas…not so true in real life, but we can think about this better story and pretend, right?
PPJ for the win!
Be the Bear!
Bob T is not a fan of reality Panda
Did we promise PPJ would swoop in and fix things?
Yes we did
Did we promise there would be a sekret weapon?
Yes, we did
Did we promise the ICE Maiden would be vanquished?
Yes, we did, indeed.
PPJ: I told yoo my hello kitty flamethrower would come in handy!
Pinky: sigh….
PPJ: but I was right, right?
Be the Bear
Bob T I told you it would be okay Panda
Come back for the exciting denouement of our story next week!
PPJ is on the scene, drinking cocoa and explaining her clever plan!
Yeah….WHAT secret weapon???? Enquiring minds want to know!
Be the Bear
Bob T secret weapon Panda
No, Unka Bob is NOT the secret weapon.
I’m not gonna lie. It feels pretty dark right now. The House Republicans have passed their No Billionaire left Behind Bill, aka Billions for Billionaires Bill. Rural hospitals will close, as people lose their Medicaid health insurance. The ripple effects will be felt in all corners of the country. Spending FEMA money on concentration camps seems like a bad idea, just as hurricane season takes hold. Tent camps in Florida? What could go wrong?
Meanwhile, the only reliable NooZ source is covering the important story of the day.
Of course, Nixon’s Ghost has entered the chat.
Be the Bear
Bob T is trying not to panic Panda
I mean…who wouldn’t get distracted by whippy cream, right?
It gets crazier and meaner by the day in the real world. I hope you are all doing okay.
Be the Bear
Bob T not sure how much of this I can take Panda
That’s right! Pinky has entered the chat! If Pinky can’t fix this, nobeary can. After all, Pinky has a secret weapon: Princess Pinky Junior.
Sending out a big thanks to all who came out on Saturday to say: NOPE! NO KINGS! Unofficial estimates are 12.1 MILLION people came out across the country and not only in typical Democratic strongholds. Keep the pressure up!
Be the Bear!
Bob T nope nope nope nope Panda
You know I don’t mean to cause trauma to the pandas, but we are living this in real time in the real world. I don’t know where this ends, either in our story here, or in the real world. We are all immigrants, or the children or grandchildren of immigrants.
Today, The Ice Maiden had a sitting US Senator ARRESTED for asking a question at a press conference. Where does this end?
Stay ‘tooned!
Be the Bear
Bob T this will not stand Panda
Do you think it will distract them for trying to hunt down Ping to deport him? Hmmmm…probably not.
I’m sure in the long run, nothing good will come of this rift between Mittens and E-Loon, but it has provided some entertainment value, am I right?
Meanwhile, our story continues!
For those who have joined us since my trip to China in 2017 (was it REALLY that long ago???) Ping Ping was a real panda that I met in china. Such a sweet bear! I decided that Bob T would bring him home, and he joined the pandas in The Panda House and became a beloved member of the panda family.
Who knew that you had to get permission to take a panda out of China?
KEEP PANDA-ING ON
Bob T I’m not sure how much more I can take Panda
I know that many of you think of the Panda Chronicles as a safe haven. Oh sure, we make fun of Mittens and his evil spawn and minions, but with times being what they are, sometimes the most troubling nooz stories won’t stray from our thoughts.
I know that some of you might have a hard time with this story. I’m not sure where it goes and I will do my best to give it a happy ending, unlike so of many of the stories we are hearing about, not to mention the ones that are not as high profile so as to get a lot of coverage.
The Mittenv2.0 regime claimed (a lie, we know) that he was only going to deport the most hardened criminals. But that is not what is happening. People who are neighbors. People who are co-workers. People who have built lives and families and businesses are among those who are getting swept up in this cruel version of The Hunger Games.
This story started forming in my head a few weeks ago, and it wouldn’t go away. We need to not look away from this humanitarian crisis within our own borders.
Be the Bear
Bob T protector of Ping Panda