Category Archives: Pinky for President

Day 30: 31 Days of Pandas

Day 30????? Do you know what that means? There is only One. More. Day. of 31 Days of Pandas!!!!

How could it come to such an abrupt, bitter end? Where will we find the pandas we need and crave??? Um..Hey! it’s not like I’m going anywhere! Panda satire will be right here where you left it! Of course you could have your own 31 days of Pandas, or even 131 days of pandas if you had all of the Panda Chronicles books in your home library!!

Meanwhile, we intercepted several communiques from the inbox of Princess Pinky, who is hard at work (really? No, just kidding!) on her latest literary triumph, The Panda Chronicles Book 8: The Pinky Defense. We think it bears (!) careful study!

Dere Unka Jeroen

I should be listed in ebbry category. See dat dis doesn’t happen again.

Sincerely,
Princess Pinky Bao Bao
Dujiangyan, China
Vote early, vote often, vote PINKY!!!!
Sent from my MePhone, the choice of pandas everywhere.

To which she received this reply:

Dear Princess Pinky!
I hope the panda chronicles will ask all your fans to vote a lot for you!
Good luck!
Kind regards,

Jeroen Jacobs
Giant Panda Global

Sounds mighty suspicious, if you ask me! But now, let’s read some ‘toons! And because I love you, here is the ENTIRE story of Pinky, Bubba, and the Canadian Twins!

Bubba: but why should I be in trubble?

I’ll talk! I’ll talk!

Pinky and the Twinkies, eh?

“If Pinky is grounded, can I have her dessert?”

uh oh…

Um…I think Pinky has Daddee wrapped around her fuzzy little paw. Just saying.

Ooooh! Did Daddee actually yell at Pinky?

What do you mean you left a note saying they are at my house?

Bubba is having so much fun with his new friends!

Hey! Where did Bubba and Mr. Bun go?

There may be political concussions!

See you in January back on our regular schedule, new ‘toons on Sunday and Wednesday, and encore presentations on Fake Facts Friday. You like it? I invented all those words!

#Resist!

Panda On
Bob T Panda

We All Feel Like This

Alas, poor Pinky. She so thought she was going to win. She had the perfect color of pink picked out to re-paint the White House, so it could be the Pink-y House. I don’t know WHAT she is going to do with all those hundreds of gallons of paint that is stored in the elephant house. We all feel for Pinky.

But what has Pinky been doing since the election?

feel

Not even CUPPYCAKES????

CALL IN THE RESERVES!!!!

Panda On!
Bob T Panda

Coming soon! 31 Days of Pandas! Where in the world is Mini Bob?

You Know What You Have to Do

We are down to the last week before the election and this is a hard week for more than one reason. But there is also great rejoicing in the land, because we now know that Twinkies 2.0 are both little girls! While they won’t get their real names until December 12th when they are 100 days old, their Panda Chronicles names have been bestowed by their particular friend and supporter, Stacy Watts, who dubbed them “Six and Seven” Excellent names, if I do say so! You know what they say about the younger children in any big family: Their names kind of get lost in the shuffle.

Meanwhile, we are all at sixes and sevens over the Meihem’s departure tomorrow. 

It is a bitter pill to swallow, that we can’t can’t keep them all. But never fear, On the pages of The Panda Chronicles, they will all stay right here where they belong, and that goes for Mr. Wu and Pinky too. After all, this is fiction right? Unfortunately, this election is not, even if it seems like it most of the time.

So let’s get to today’s episode….

Do NOT mess with Pinky and the Meihems!

Do NOT mess with Pinky and the Meihems! They are fearless!

Be the Bear
Bob T Panda

And be sure to tune in on Friday when we give a farewell salute to the Meihems! Oh yeah…and don’t forget to VOTE!!!!

Where IS Pinky anyway?

Bubba feels so bad about falling for another one of Pinky’s schemes. he’s such a good little panda and Pinky, well, Pinky has a lot of influence on him. Mommee Mei tries to explain to Bubba that the world is not a safe place for pandas out on their own.

And just who is Pinky with?

Pinky

Well, who did you THINK she would enlist in her final attempt to stop Mittens the cat?

So we are getting very close to election day, and whatever views you hold, it’s important to take part and vote.  And if you’re having a hard time making up your mind…

Watch Pinky’s video one more time!

 

Be the Bear,
Bob T Panda

Resistance is Futile

One of my favorite lines in The Hitch Hiker’s Guide to the Galaxy is when some robot or other is running around yelling Resistance is Futile and Arthur Dent and Ford Prefect are doing everything they can to resist, to no avail. It’s kind of like that when Mommee Mei turns her laser sharp gaze on Bubba, in order to make him spill the beans. The Vogons have nothing on Mommee when it comes to wielding power.

Did you really think Bubba would be able to resist telling all he knows?

Resistance is futile

All Mei Xiang has to do it look stern and…

Be sure to tune in this Friday for part 2 of A Halloween Carol!

Be the Bear,
Bob T Panda

The Great Escape

One of the things I love about Pinky is that she always has a plan. If one plan crashes against an immovable object (say, Mommee, for instance) Pinky always has plan B, C, D, or Z at the ready! And there has never been a den that she could not escape from. Bubba, you still have much to learn from Pinky!

And now, The Great Escape!

The Great Escape

Of COURSE Pinky has a secret tunnel!

Pinky never ceases to amaze!

Are you enjoying A Halloween Carol? Be sure to tune in Friday for part 2! And while this story has not yet appeared in print, did you know there are SIX Panda Chronicle books available to have for your very own? yep, that’s right! You can get them here!

Be the Bear,
Bob T Panda

The Long Paw of the Law

Wait. Just. A. Minute. BUBBA gets grounded???? Bubba is the GOOD panda! Bubba is the SWEET panda! Bubba is his momma’s darling boy! Bubba is not Pinky! But Pinky has taught him well, don’t you think? The law of Mom applies to all pandas equally, or so it seems. Oh, the injustice of it all!

I can’t believe that BUBBA has been grounded!!!!

The long paw of the law

I don’t think this is entirely fair!

and don’t call mee Boo Boo!

Don’t forget! This Friday The Panda Chronicles presents part 1 of A Halloween Carol! Huzzah! Get your popcorn ready!

Be the Bear,
Bob T Panda

The Jig is Up

Roh Roh. What did I tell you last week about the all seeing eyes of Mommee Mei? It seems that those panda cams have more than one application and now, now the jig is up and the heavy paw of the law is about to descend on Pinky AND Bubba. This is not good. This is not good at all!!

What should Pinky and Bubba do NOW?????

the jig is up

I don’t think Mei is buying the homework thing.

Bubba does have that extremely innocent look down, doesn’t he? I think Pinky taught it to him.

I hope you’ll keep reading The Panda Chronicles, because coming up for the next two FABULOUS FURRY FRIDAYS we have a special treat! An encore presentation (in two parts) of our Halloween classic (well, we can declare it a classic, can’t we?) A Halloween Carol! As I am not one to deny myself the pleasure of laughing at my own jokes, I have to say this story is a hoot, not to mention Bubba’s first feature presentation. All your favorite pandas have a role in this holiday drama, so be sure to tune in this Friday for some spooky panda fun.

Be the Bear,
Bob T Panda

 

Sibling Cooperation

Mei Xiang should be so pleased and proud! The level of sibling cooperation between Pinky and Bubba has reached an all time pinnacle! And Bubba is getting so smart about the cyber! heh! As a veteran of a number of Kickstarter campaigns, I think Bubba is very well prepared and has thought things through really well.

Well, he thought of everything except the all seeing eye of Mommee!

Will Bubba’s clever plan succeed while eluding Mommee’s watchful eye?

sibling cooperation

Bubba is such a smart little panda

And thanks to the wonderful world of useless information that makes up the internet, I have learned that today is Take your Teddy Bear to Work Day! Really! Cordelia’s mom: get Teddy Rosalie ready for a day at the office!

Be the (Teddy) Bear
Bob T Panda

Bubba: Junior Computer Whiz

Bubba has now turned a whole year old! He is such a smart little panda, but we never knew how smart he has become until now, what with Pinky occupying everyone’s attention. But as it turns out, that Bubba is quite the junior computer whiz kid. Takes after his sister, no doubt, as she was the one who learned how to hack into the traffic control around Zoo Cublanta at a very early age. (Pinky: that evidence is entirely CIRCUMSTANTIAL! I admit to nothing!)

Nevertheless….

Bubba has a cunning plan and he is putting it into action!

computer whiz

When did Bubba get to be so smart!

Has anyone noticed how gray Mei Xiang’s fur is starting to turn?

More Panda News!!!!

The Wahington State Panda Foundation (Heretofore known as WASPaF) is moving forward with meetings in China and site visits by the Chinese panda procurement people in their quest (a noble and brilliant one I might add) to bring pandas to Washington state. (Our motto: bring pandas to the OTHER Washington) News stories on TV and radio and newspapers report that the potential homes for the pandas, The Point Defiance Zoo in Tacoma, and the Woodland Park Zoo in Seattle (WOOZPPAH!) are saying, “hey! No one asked US if we wanted pandas!”

To that I sayFie! Of COURSE you want pandas! Everyone wants pandas!!! And for those who say:

A)” the money could be better spent elsewhere”, I say, ” well of COURSE it could, but we’re talking about PANDAS here!!!!!!

or

B) the “I thnk all wild animals should be wild and free and not locked up in zoos” people should visit a modern zoo sometime. Do I think pandas should be in the wild? Hell yes, just as soon as you restore the millions of square miles of their habitat that no longer exisits. A green pea in a 10 gallon bucket doesn’t begin to represent the ratio of lost habitat to the present panda habitat remaining.

They are doing the best they can to keep pandas from becomming extinct and return some to the wild. But that is a topic for another day!

For now, I just say, WOOZPPAH,

Be the Bear,
Bob T Panda